Photo and blog by Sharman Dow
“One who loves a pure heart and who speaks with grace, will have the king for a friend.” –Proverbs 22:11
Developing the art of being gracious will put your career in high gear toward success, because when you are a gracious person you are approachable and can be trusted. You are someone who is marked with tact and dignity, and are someone others like to be around. Webster’s Dictionary defines “gracious” as being “Godly.” It is having an expression of gratitude for all things in life.
Being gracious is having social skills that are characterized by charm, good taste and a generous spirit. People always want to do business with people they like, and having the ability to be gracious in all circumstances excels your likability with others – especially those with whom you do business. When you are characterized as a gracious person, people will flock to you.
The wonderful thing about being gracious is it is an art form that can be learned and developed. Some people are born naturally with this skill, and for others it’s a gradual progress that takes years of many mistakes and setbacks. So how do you develop the art of being gracious in the next year and become the person others want to be around and do business with?
The first thing you can do is analyze yourself. How do you respond to others, especially in stressful situations? Are you treating other people the way you want to be treated? When the chips are down and you are frustrated by circumstances, can you hold your peace? Are you a thoughtful person that takes the extra step in expressing gratitude for the little things, first to God then to the people around you?
I always tell people when I meet a prospective client for the first time I look for common interests we might have. It breaks the ice with a new acquaintance because I am creating a pleasant conversation that holds their attention. People like to talk about themselves, and if you show an interest in the things they like, they will remember you. With clients, I always follow-up with an email to thank them for their time and recap what we discussed, including the personal discussions we might have had in our meeting.
Judging and criticizing others robs you of your ability to be gracious. We all like to be regarded by others with positive reinforcement that lifts our day, so why not start showing others the same? It’s so easy to be pleasant toward people marked with a genuine concern for their welfare as you search for the goodness in them. Find the humor in those stressful situations, which makes for good cheer. Learn to laugh at yourself, too.
A thank-you note for a gift or thoughtful gesture goes a long way with others, especially if it is hand-written. Remember, it’s how you want to be treated and taking the extra step to be kind.
To me, the one person who exemplified graciousness, elegance and sophistication was Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis. As the First Lady, she brought the White House to a whole new level of grace, beauty and sophistication. Her clothing style set new trends in our culture with her hats, scarves and gloves. She never insulted people, but always had something nice to say about them. Most importantly, she never involved herself with malicious gossip, but rather set new standards of good behavior. It is said that when John ˜F. Kennedy was assassinated, she personally wrote hand-written notes of thanks to every person who had sent flowers to his funeral. In a word, she embodied graciousness!
Learn the art of graciousness and you will empower yourself to achieve success and people will be drawn to you!!
Sharman Dow is the founder of the Empower Women’s Conference, coming October 22nd to Orange County. Register today!
